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MiddleChildSynd
The middle or second born child or children often have the sense of not belonging. They fight to receive attention from parents and others because they feel many times they are being ignored or dubbed off as being the same as another sibling. Being in the middle a child can feel insecure. The middle child often lacks drive and looks for direction from the first born child. Sometimes a middle child feels out of place because they are not over achievers and like to go with the flow of things.
Being a middle child would mean they are loners. They really don?t like to latch on to a person in a relationship, there fore they have trouble keeping one due to lack of interest. Not liking to take the limelight for anything, they are not over achievers and just simply work enough work to get by, and typically that goes with school as well as a career. They are however very artistic and creative. If forced to use abilities they will work well, but do not work well under pressure. They often start several projects but rarely keep focused long enough to finish a project. The best career move for a middle child would be along the lines of using their creative. Going into a writing or journalism career, and into a career that they could freely express themselves would be good. Anything that would have hours that are flexible, and projects that frequently changed would be good for a middle born child. Since relationships are not of high importance to a middle child, often times they are alone. However, the best possible match for a middle child would be a last born.
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has added a new journalI been the youngest for 5 years and then became the middle child. I do not think I suffer from middle child / spoiled baby of the family syndrome .. if there is such a thing.
So I was wondering , what about people with four children. Do they have 2 kids with "Middle Child Syndrome"? Or does it only happens when you have an odd child out?
What if you are the only sister or brother wouldn't you have the same issues?
Well, none of my siblings were treated any differently by my parents. We all were beaten equally. Yup ! No favoritism at my home. Come to think of it.. all my siblings grew up to be secure indivisuals. I also never encountererd any sibling rivalry either..
So , I wonder if there is such a thing as middle child syndrome.
I don't know I am just throwing ideas out.
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has added a new journalSalaams, hello, bonjour!
I'm a middle child (as the username suggests) but I must admit the front page description paints us middle'uns as a pretty dull, miserable lot don't you think?
I mean I'm quite a happy-go-lucky sort most of the time (AlHamdulilLaah) and yet, i did see a resmblance between the "creative" etc etc part of it and myself (smile).
As for craving attention or being a poor realtionship maintainer.... well that I am not (usaully) - but I do bite off more than I can chew in terms of commitments... I get so involved and busy with projects and community activites that I get too snowed under to call my friends at a decent hour (sigh) - but such is life, eh?
When I was a wee little thing, it used to get me down, being in the middle. I used to say: My big sister is special because she's the eldest, my big brother is because he's the only boy and my kid sister is because she's the youngest... but there's nothing special about me... (awww, sniff). Then one day I said all this to my mum and she told me I was special because I had all tha qualities of the other three but with no reason to feel big-headed about it - and that made me VERY special.... ok, ok, so that was my mum's cop-out for her little six-year-old - but it worked! I never felt 'left out' or 'unrecognised' after that.
Well, I just thought I'd share all that to pass some time... enjoy your day folks!
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has added a new journalHow many siblings do you have that are older/younger, what are their genders, and what's the age difference?
I have 1 sis (2.5 years older) and 2 bros (6 and 11 years younger).
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has added a new journali'm middle child. i've studied phychology, and i've read a few books on birth order, the most detailed one about it, that i remember is "The Birth order book" by Dr. Kevin Leman
and the reason i remember it so clearly, is becasuse it proves itself so wrong.
this dude obviously believes in what he's writting, he raises his children according to these beliefs, and everythign they do, he see's it through the "birth order" goggles that he wears number 1 takes control because he's number one
number 2 speaks up because he's number 2 .
although speaking up could be seen as taking control, but that can't be it, because he's number 2 after all.
etc etc....
it's psychology. cultural and fluid, much more art than science.
in his book, he goes through the birth order of his family, and says how it's skewed because he doesn't have the traditional 2 parens 2.3 kids and a dog family.
well, most of the world doesn't have that. And lost of cultures will give the first born male the attention the first born anything would get.
my parents didn't do things the way he did things with his kids, and i would argue italians, morroccans, russians etc all do things differently as well. families where there are more than 2 primary caretakers (aunts, uncles, grandparents, older siblings, etc) will also skew all these theories.
much of psychology is culturally based. and fails to be easily generalized.
birth order theories more so than most. (youngest can't control themselves and tend to be overwieght? all americans are overwieght and few palestinians are, it's cultural eating habits. not birth oder)
birth order my arabi bum. its a fun way for Dr. Leman to make money, and the books are somewhat interestings, especially when he goes into detail about his own kids, and how the birth order doenst work with them.
in his defence, he does stress that these theories are not set in stone, but theyare just generalized observations and assumptions. no more accurate than someone writting a treastise on islam after watching all of Oprah Winfrey's shows on Islam.
(she's had a few, some good some bad, all barely relevant.)