If only ?

I speak half-truths,
afraid to let the whole out,
afraid I?ll be swallowed
by past mistakes,
my usual missteps
but I find you know
what?s unspoken.

I look in your eyes and know
I don?t have to say anything
if I don?t want to.

You watch me closely
during silences, holding back,
afraid of being rejected.
Watching the storm
rage in my head
you swallow your words,
and kiss me hard.
You live there too.

You look in my eyes and know
you don?t have to say anything
if you don?t want to.

We are the walking wounded,
commiserating not with words
but with nods, sighs, silences.

We insist we are healed
as we try to distract
attention from our scars

If only you could see
what I see in you.

If only the mirror would show me
why you believe.

If only ?

If only ?