With almost all my friends married and pressure mounting from my parents who are visiting, i thought i would share some humor on the topic of being single (something many can relate to and most can laugh about!) ....


A parody: Oh the joys of being single (the guys version)

oh the joys of being single
there are too many to tell
sometimes it feels like heaven
but sometimes it surely feels like hell

you wake up in the morning
after an uneventful night of sleep
not to the voice of your wife
but to the stoopid alarm beep

staring at the ceiling
you wonder how it has come to be
that a charming fellow like yourself
wakes up not next to a pretty honey

as this morning guy thing wears off
to the bathroom you go to pee
look yourself in the mirror
and an old man you begin to see

the hair is turning white
wrinkles are appearing too
and you begin to wonder
if any girl will now look at you

but after a quick refreshing shower
and a bucket of gel to the hair
you feel young once again
almost like a player

off to work you are set to go
but with noone to kiss good bye
not even having had breakfast
cause you?ve noone with whom to have the chai

you have stopped believing in god
cause he hasn't made your dreams come true
so confidently you walk to your new benz
believing the benz instead will get the girl for you

approaching your shiny new car
a blond in the parking lot you see
you get so very excited
and ask her if later she would be free

she gives you a nice big smile
raising your hopes ever so high
but like a chicken you begin to run
cause in her boyfriend?s arms you don't wanna die

he is a big guy now that you see him
so quietly you get into your latest benz
"she wasn't beautiful anyway" you say
blaming not seeing it on your new contact lens

but you still feel cool
after all its only the first strike
there are many fish out there you say
surely one will bite

out of the parking lot you pull
but see your competition in the rear
he is your mortal enemy in the hunt
he is your coworker, the other gel haired player

and as you both hurriedly race to work
on this yet another beautiful day
you are sadly caught in the cop?s radar
just like girls are in yours everyday

slowing down on the road to hell
you pull over the shoulder in disgrace
look for your license and registration
as you see the smirk on the other player?s face

he slows down only to sneer
and flies by caring not for your fate
for the same reason as you, he is in a hurry
to ask the new girl in your office for a date

that race you have surely lost
to yourself you begin to think
might as well start practicing for the next
so suddenly you start to wink

but the female cop that pulled you over
doesn?t think it all funny
especially when you tell her
?quickly give me the ticket honey?

she ain?t pleased with your behavior
and puts the cuffs on you
tells you that you are heading to the slammer
just when you thought it was a fantasy come true

at the jail you are given your one call
and you call your lawyer friend
but this silly poem is getting waaaay too long
so this is where the story will have to end

if you think all this was a waste of time
then stop laughing at what i wrote
if you wasted time reading this
then you are probably in the same boat!