Time for change

I think one of the hardest things to do is to muster up enough energy, motivation and inspiration from deep within you during times of calamity. Face it, most of us are simply breathing, dreaming that things will get better tomorrow. We often live for tomorrow and not for the moment. This journal is really not for everyone, it's mostly a reminder to myself and a way to channel my thoughts.
I'm at a pivotal moment in my life where i need to make some crucial decision that will forever change the course of my life. I was watching after after and it hit me when Will Smith said " Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist in in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. That is near insanity....fear is a choice." I kind of always known that it is the fear of the unknown that keeps us held back from making change in our lives. Not know the results of our changes causes us to hesitate. At present we are comfortable in our daily routines even though we want to change certain things but we are afraid to make those changes simply because we fearful of what the outcome will be.
I'm tired of just living out the daily rituals of our so called lives. We pour way too much energy into petty things. We lose sleep over things we cannot change or have the power to change. It is often too difficult to accept what's been done and move forward. Aside from suffering from such an ailment I also focus way too much on others. For once in my life I'm trying to be selfish, trying to look out for myself. I've always been concerned of other peoples feelings and try hard not to inflict any pain on others. But you know what? That only stunts ones growth. To always focus on others you end up ignoring your own potential. You cannot truly understand ones potential only until you let go and you take a hard look in the mirror. At the end of everything it is you that counts, no one else. Life is way too short to pester over things that you cannot change. But instead focus on things you can change and those that are holding you back from being the best you can be tell them to fuck off! Yes, I finally said it. I'm done with pleasing others while each day passes my life comes closer to an end.
I hope that I can continue to remind myself to live for the moment and make each day count. Do NOT focus on tomorrow because tomorrow may never come!